Choices Today, Fate Tomorrow


I have really been reflecting lately on choices that I have made. As I quite frequently tell my children:

Every choice has a consequence, good or bad. It’s your responsibility to accept the consequences because of your choices.

Wordsmith the sentence all you want – it is, always has been, and will continue to be true. Its also a really hard pill to swallow sometimes.

I have recently been faced with very hard choices. It seems right now that for me, I am at a major turning point in my life. Everything I have been faced with in the past week is going to directly affect my short term goals. The effect will also be immediate. It’s not just one choice, its multiple. Some of my past choices even seem to be hindering the issues that I am currently faced with.

I am sure that everyone has made choices in their life that they would rather not remember. I am a fan of saying, I wouldn’t change it because it led me to where I am. I still believe that is true. Every choice I have made or that was made for me, has led me to be the person I am today. No matter how good or bad that might be. I have developed some really awful traits, I have also grown, evolved in my adulthood, gained understanding and awareness and learned to see broader pictures.

I wouldn’t change any of it. However, all of the choices don’t go away. You don’t get to reinvent yourself all the time. Sometimes we have new beginnings that let us shed some things that we haven’t liked. More often than not, for me, I am still surrounded by the same people that I was when I made choices that were not handled well. Those people still see me for the person I was then, not who I have grown to be now. That is one of the hardest things for me to handle.

Because of the havoc being caused by this situation of having 3 major decisions – life changing decisions – to make all at once (and they all impacted each other) I started looking for help. I found some great articles online that all gave good advice. The ultimate answer – I am in decision overload. I have had a very difficult week, I have hemmed and hawed over things that I may not even be able to decide. I am deciding to stop making the decision.

——————————————————————————————————————

I wrote the above post – left un-posted – on November 1st. Today, a month later, I have made the decisions. They are life changing and affect so many people. While the choices I faced were hard to make, I am so grateful for the opportunities they have provided to me.

Enough with the cryptic language already! I have made the choice to move my family back to Florida for my job. This is an opportunity for myself and my family that I feel was too important to pass up. Unfortunately, granny and poppy live here now and can’t come with us. By making this choice, we are ultimately making them relive a very difficult time because we made the choice 4 years ago to the date to move to WV when they were in Florida. They have only lived here by us for 18 months now. I can’t imagine how this has made them feel. I only hope for their love and acceptance in this decision.

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Agnes King
    Nov 30, 2013 @ 08:14:40

    Maria, you will always have our love and support! We are so proud of you and what you have become, you are the daughter I never had, a wonderful mom and wife. We understand the choices you have made, just know we love you and are very proud of you! You will see us often in Florida, we will always be a part of the kids life and we know you all will visit us when you can. Always remember, we are a phone call away! Love you!

    Reply

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